Miranda: Now, I know what you’re thinking . . . “But Miranda, your dad doesn’t seem like a sperm donor. He sure doesn’t need the money. Can this be right?”

Sparrow: What I’m thinking is, when did you test my DNA.

Miranda: A while ago. Got it off a coffee cup. Is it important?

The point is, I haven’t asked Dad about this yet. It would be a pretty obvious tipoff that he has another kid. I’m not putting him on that trail until you’re ready to be looked for.

Besides . . . your mom’s a lesbian too, right? Maybe she made up this whole story because she was embarrassed to admit she ever had a thing with a guy?

Sparrow: She has admitted it, and she’s not embarrassed. Sometimes people experiment while they’re figuring things out. Nothing wrong with that. The donor story stands.

. . . so next step is to go talk to Cohen about this?

Miranda: If you want. I’m in no rush. I kinda like getting to have a secret sister.