Hey, remember these two?

(Still bravely fighting for that front page!)

___

Up in MA, back to the present.

Sparrow: And with that kind of strategy, we’re practically guaranteed to have a Democratic landslide in November!

Mrs. Applebaum: Bravo, dear! I’m so proud of you.

Sparrow: Thanks, Mom.

Mrs. Applebaum: Sparrow? You look a bit low . . . Are you eating properly? Do you want me to send more herbal supplements?

Sparrow: I’m fine. Although if you could find us a replacement recliner, that would be nice. Just wondering about something . . . it’s the reason I asked you to come visit, actually . . . What was my sperm donor like? And was there anything . . . weird . . . about him?

Mrs. Applebaum: So you finally want to know . . .

Sadly, the records are sealed and I didn’t write any of it down.

Sparrow: Thanks, Mom.

Mrs. Applebaum: Of course, you’re not a minor any more! If you want to sue the agency to get that information unsealed, you have the legal standing. And my full support. I’ve always wanted you to have a strong connection to your heritage. That’s why I picked a donor who looked as much like me as possible! So that even if you only ever got in touch with my culture, you wouldn’t have to feel you were missing out!