The Zen and the Damaged

A fan site for fake newspeople

All the different faces and versions of Colbert.

Work in progress. For the current state of the images, see the wallpaper, with a special guest appearance by the God Machine.

“I celebrate myself and sing myself;
And what I assume, you shall assume…
Do I contradict myself?
Very well, then, I contradict myself;
(I am large–I contain multitudes.)”


Past and Future Versions


Ickle Stephen

Reporting from the moon!

Local-news Stephen

Past version, as seen in various segments about News 7 at Noon.

The Undercover Reporter

As seen in America: The Book.

Daily Show Stephen

With flak jacket (lots and lots of segments).

Normal Stephen

Sometimes splits into red-tie-Stephen and blue-tie-Stephen. Pictured with namesake and adopted eagle son, Stephen Junior.

Future Stephen

Found in I Am America, this clip.


Compatriots


Esteban Colberto

As seen in excerpts of Colberto Reporto Gigante.

Steve Col-Bert

Appeared on the show April 22.

Romulan St’e'pha’n Kh’olber’t

Briefly invaded in this segment.

Stephane ColberT

Stephen’s French-Canadian alter ego.

Jermaine Maine

Totally loves Miley Cyrus.

Pocket Stephen

Hangs out with Dennis Kucinich.

Stephen’s Cardboard Cutout

Very useful!


Alternate Universes


Tek Jansen

As seen in millions of books. Pictured with Raven (Wigfield – not technically in the TCR universe, but Tek wouldn’t be Tek without a beautiful woman on his arm).

Liberal Stephen

As seen in The Wørd, October 2, 2007: Troops Out Now.

Happy Stephen

From the ThreatDown, December 10, 2008: Happiness.


Jon Has Alternates Too

Giovanni Stewarto

From the Daily Show’s Italian franchise: Lo Show Giornale con Giovanni Stewarto.

Jon-II

Cloning is illegal, so Jon’s backup self had better stay off-camera.

Beck!Jon

These…are those glasses.

Featured Posts

tinyjonstuck

Art: The Adventures of Tiny Jon, part 3

In which some accidental worldbuilding starts to creep into this ridiculous scenario. Who knew? But first, the usual adorableness from an eleven-inch Jon. Why Jon found a lot to identify with in Ratatouille: He eats a lot of foods that are prepared in small quantities or carved into fitting portions, but there’s no substitute for [...]

I can just hear Al Madrigal saying “It’s about time.”

The correspondent profiles have been brought up-to-date! Everyone through Jessica Williams has an illustration, and the newest four even have proper, detailed, link-heavy profiles in place. The site also has new header images, updated to reflect the current cast. When I remembered that I’d downloaded the font “CNN”, I couldn’t resist trying it out in [...]

fake_news_quidditch_rumble

Meta: The Hogwarts Question

Given: If there’s one question besides “Who should this character hook up with?” guaranteed to start a fervent, polarized, opinionated fandom discussion, it’s “What Hogwarts house should this character be in?” What follows is my reading of “Stephen”, Jon, and a few correspondents, as well as notes about other arguments TDS/TCR fandom has made along [...]

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